Sunday 28 January 2007

Desk!

Bloggers I cheer for Jemima and Dan have done this. I like following the crowd, you might call me a sheep or a jeep or something. Pssst. Click on the image to see it bigger, you'll probably have to, I have rambled all over the photo.

Tuesday 23 January 2007

A MeMe

Two bloggers who I would quite happily cheer for on from the touchlines have done this MeMe, so I shall too. Jemima and Bert have done it if you're curious as to which two bloggers I would turn up at the touchlines cheering on. But I don't want to suggest that I wouldn't turn upto your event other bloggers and not cheer on the touchline, I generally like cheering folks! Woooo! You go girlfriend.

1. If you had to choose one vice in exclusion of all others, what would it be?
This one for sure. A Metal vice. Okay I didn't really understand the question.

2. If you could change one specific thing about the world, what would it be?
I would eradicate racism, people should not be allowed to say "Welsh people have smelly feet" or "Polish people are poor at pissing" or "People from luxemberg have small tongues". These people are racist fuckers and should have their face pasted on the cover of the Sun.

3. Name the cartoon character you identify with the most.
Fry from Futurama, a ginger who doesn't understand the world around him. Much like me, hence the answering of the question.

4. If you could live one day of your life over again, which one would it be?
Fuck knows, my birth probably, I was a bitch letting my mum spend so long in labour.

5. If you could go back into history and spend a day with one person, who would it be?
William Gladstone, my favourite prime minster these fair shores have had. I loved writing an essay about him for A Level history so much that I began to fancy the man.

6. What is one thing you lost, sold or threw away that you wish you had back?
My Star Wars lego, I stupidly sold it with the rest of my lego a couple of years ago, I should have kept it with the rest of my Star Wars toys but I fucking forgot it was with the rest of my lego.

7. What is your one most important contribution to this world?
My strong almost dillusional thoughts and beliefs on gingers.

8. What is your one hidden talent that nearly no one knows about?
My intelligence. I got told by my friend who visited me at work that "I looked like one of the most intelligent people at Somewhere what I worked this one time" It might not have been quite worded like that, I may have mis-quoted her, but... Intelligence? Me? It's a hidden talent.

9. What is your most cherished possession?
My laptop, no musn't be materialistic... My health... Yeah. That bollocks.

10. What word describes you better than any other?
Strange.

Sunday 21 January 2007

Frustrations

Hi fans and fanettes. I had a frustrating day, going to work quite unawake after our house party the night before was frustrating. Work frustrated me yet again. I've come to accept customers like Somewhere what I worked this one time, for whatever god awful reason that is, but I can't accept customers who come into Somewhere what I worked this one time asking to buy a particular product, it's not that kind of store! One customer seemed to find it hard to believe that we didn't sell extension leads. "Where's your electrical department?" I got asked. Just what kind of store do you think this is. FUCK OFF TO ARGOS DICKWEAPS! Their new catologue is exciting. Made me think of buying one of these mp3 player things the kids have now-a-days.

Oh and another frustration, this ad I saw in the metro that some how had circulated it's way to the Somewhere what I worked this one time staff room.
And whilst I didn't have it in me to phone my mum earlier, I had it in me to phone with the 141 prefix infront so they don't know I'm calling and leave a message saying "I fucking love ginger hair" and hang up without leaving my name or number. I'm a ginger coward.

Well the show would only be some embarrasing BBC3 wank... probably.

No one would want me associated with such wankery.

Thursday 18 January 2007

Uni has rebegun

Hello there peeps, I love blogging when I've not got much to say. I'll blog about my week. Well term has rebegun (a word that will catch on now matter horrible it is gramatically!), so far I've had to put up with bitching and I've been very silly as usual, almost becoming a fucking characiture of myself. Oh and my tooth hurts, I think I need a filling, not that I've had one before, but I suspect I need one if I'm going by what it's called, (I don't want to talk about dentistry with anyone to confirm what I suspect, dentistry scares me)

Monday 15 January 2007

Written Notice

I'm still working at Somewhere what I worked this one time for some reason, and for some reason Somewhere what I worked this one time are having a staff meeting (or an ASAM, I'm not quite sure what is stands for, Assocatiates stare and moan or summat, interpretations are more than welcome from my lovely commentors) and I want to give them a sarcastic letter where I say I can't be bothered to attend and avoid disciplinary action at the same time (whatever that means, slapped wrist? Which is incidently my response to anything when I get told I've done something wrong at work), but I don't have the guts to give them the letter to them, so I'll use my blog, my welcome home of Somewhere what I worked this one time bitching.

Dear [Rude word when I should have said people],

Unfortunatly I am unable to attend the ASAM meeting thingy in February because sadly I've been struck down with a horrible crippling condition where I can't be bothered to attend.

If said meeting was on a day I'm contracted to work on (if I even have a fucking contract) then my crippling condition would hold back for an hour and permit me to stay, but having said meeting on a weekday has brought such a major case of my condition (some doctors I have spoken to have called it laziness, others have just called it 'a loathing for Somewhere what I worked this one time') that I just can't attend. Sure 6PM is a lovely time, and with my university schedule (which goes no later than 5) I could manage to attend, and the buffet you are offering sounds wonderful (cold pizza and cheese and pineapple on sticks I hope!), and the fact I'll be paid for turning up soundd tempting, but dear sods I got out my calculator and calculated I'd only earn £8.25 and that's not really enough to combat my condition.

Sure if I go to a competivley priced bar (so not a bar in Reading town centre) I'd be able to buy 4 drinks for that price and be drunk (I'm a bit of lightweight Somewhere what I worked this one time, useful informaton for you there, so feel free managment to get be rat assed at work, it would make my shifts tollerable) but I just can't be bothered.

Don't get me wrong I loved the previous meeting. I loved that the manager INSISTED in continuing in her jokes after jokes (can some one point out to her that she isn't funny, it's just embarrasing). I loved the patronising manner loss protection tried to drum into our heads the way to help prevent people steeling by offering sweets and saying a patronising 'well done' when we'd say simple stuff like 'you can text.' I also loved that we were told for some reason about the wonderful promotion Robbie Walliams has done for Somewhere what I worked this one time with his hit song rudebox which for some god awful reason the manager seemed to think was great, it was only a shame that at the last meeting I hadn't the guts to shout that it was a shit song. And I loved that we were told that the Reading store was being advertised on local television, that excited me, the thought of serving more foreign customers who seem to think you can buy anything at the store and assume that everything in the store is cheap and a bargain.

So in summary [Rude word when I should have said people], whilst the idea of £8.25 extra being in my wallet, and the excitement about the company and the store that no doubt I will learn I just can't be bothered to go, so I would be most greatful if you could let me keep my job and let me not attened at the same time.

Cheers loves.

Tuesday 9 January 2007

Geeky Mortgages!

As a going away present from my lovely mother I recieved this lovely, delightful, charming, beautiful calender from The Mortgage Business
Okay I more swiped it from my mum's work for the sheer awfulness of this calender. The stars (or staff) appear in this quite awful, quite naff, but quite funny, calender showing the staff as superheros. Most of them resembling well known superheros, the ocassional character offering a hero name such as the Doctor Oc rip off being called 'Multi Man' or the superman type hero being called 'TMB Man'. I love it so much that it proudly sits on my desk for some reason, probably sheer randomness.

Mortgages look cool, I want one.